Wednesday, 24 March 2010
I feel so tired at the moment. Its not really surprising seems I was up until 3.00am working on an essay. I did intend stoping at 9.00pm but I seemed to get a second wind. I'm not sure why I am such a night owl but I definately work better at night. The downside is that I can't seem to get up much enthusiasm for working again today. I have an essay deadline on Friday so I guess I will just have to knuckle down. Perhaps more tea will help? Or a little snooze? Seems that I didn't get up untill 10.30am I think the tea will have to do. I have already tried a sugar rush but the Jelly Babies seem to be sleeping as well.
My journey to the cross is going well but I will be glad when I finally get there. I have enjoyed studying for an MA but didn't realize how hard it would be when I started. The work load shifts up a gear, expectations step up a gear... more is required of me. And then we have the hunt to find the church that God is calling me to. Life has been a juggling game since september. A one handed juggling game at that having developed a repetative strain injury to my right hand.
I have met some wonderful people in my search to find a church and have had a few laughs with John, my husband along the way. Normally God makes it very clear where I am supose to be and what I am supose to be doing. He has been less direct in my hunt for a church but his guidance has never the less been clear. Although I can't help but think of a pinball machine where I am the ball that seems to be bouncing off the bumpers at a great rate of knots only to end up down the hole and have to start off all over again. Sometimes I have actively sought the black hole as a place of safety, sometimes I have been spat out of the game and have no choice... but thats the game! There have been a few bonus points gained and clearly I have learnt a lot about different churches and about myself in the whole process. I think John's role in all this has been the plunger that you pull out to give the ball a flick in the right direction. Sometimes I haven't really wanted to play the game and John has had to give me a kick in the right direction. He is such a positive influence in my life - I really am truely blessed.